Sunday, November 1, 2009

Pre-Term Labor Scare Part II: Living in a Hospital for Over a Week

I was originally given a room intended for high risk pregnancies where I could deliver if necessary. I was on the strictest bed rest so I couldn't get up at all - even to use the bathroom. This meant that I got to discover the joys of bed pans. For those of you uninitiated into the joy of emptying your bowels into a plastic container, basically you form a human bridge over a small plastic tub, relieve yourself, and then stew in your own filth while you wait for the nurse to come back to wipe you. I actually would point out if I thought they missed a spot while wiping. Once when I was concerned that my over-full bladder might make the bed pan runneth over, the nurse left an extra bed pan and told Mark that he could switch them out if necessary. (Uh, no.)

Bed pan montage!

The next day I was given a new room, and let me tell you, it was really exciting just to get wheeled down the corridor to see something other than the confines of my old room. Thankfully this time I was given bathroom privileges which meant I got to stand for the first time in 36 hours. I was given a chair for showering.

Shower chair! Not sure why mine has the hole in the seat...

However, something new was added, leg irons. My calves were encased in wraps that squeezed in and out (much like blood pressure gauges) in order to prevent me from developing deep vein thrombosis. The wraps were plugged into the end of my bed so I always had to get unpluged just so I could get up to go to the bathroom. (Usually my calls to the nurse would go something like this: "Can you unshackle me? I need to pee.")

Me, my leg irons, and lots of random junk on my table.

Leg iron close-up! Mark painted my toenails a few weeks ago.

This new room was a post-delivery room, and included another chair-bed for Mark. He slept over the first two nights, but after that I told him to sleep at home, because it's really hard to sleep in a hospital. I was regularly awakened to:
  • take drugs at least 3 times a night
  • pee (being pregnant that's at least every 2 hours). Each time I had to call the nurse twice - once to unshackle me and then again to reshackle me.
  • be alerted that the nurse shift was changing at 4:30 a.m. (the new nurse would come in and turn on the light to put her phone number on the dry erase board)
  • talk to doctors who would start arriving at 6 a.m. to see how I was doing

Next time...
Part III: Food, Dogs, and Evil Contraction Monitors


  1. OMG, I am seriously feeling SO BAD FOR YOU right now.

  2. Those leg irons are dead sexy. You could use them for a geriatric roller derby costume next Halloween.

    Seriously, I'm glad they're staying in to bake longer and hope there are minimal escape attempts as they get closer to term.

  3. I've been following your blog for a few weeks now and thought it was about time I say something :) I'm also pregnant with twins (14w) and just want to thank you for sharing everything you're going through. I even had my husband read your most recent posts on your preterm labor situation. Stuff we need to be aware of that may lie ahead... anything is a possibility it seems. I hope that you are able to take it easy and the babies stay put for several more weeks! The bits of humor are very refreshing, and much needed too :) Thanks again ~ Cathy

  4. don't you just love how they could give a fuck if you are sleeping! god forbid you actually get any rest while in the hospital. I hope things stabilize from here on out!-rachel

  5. @Sara: Aw, thanks! It was a scary week but almost a month has past now since I was first admitted which is really good news for my little munchkins. Still, they require more baking time...

    @Melissa: With those leg irons it's as though the nurses were confused as to who was making a break for it - me or the twins! "Geriatric roller derby costume" - love it!

    @Cathy: I love hearing about other twin moms who found my blog! Obviously the majority of twin moms don't get put on bed rest, but it's good to get any baby-related classes or traveling out of the way early just in case.

    Just reading your blogs. Your very first ultrasound looks like mine. :) As a first time mom it's also crazy trying to figure out what gear you need with the added complication of what you need with twins. Good luck and congrats!

    @Rachel: Yeah, it's pretty crazy how little sleep you get in the hospital of all places.

  6. @rachel: seriously, fuck that, man, don't you fucking hate how fucking doctors wake you the fuck up in the middle of the fucking night to make sure you're fucking ok and don't fucking give birth too fucking soon?-matthew